If you know me, you know that I don't get scared very easily. I'm a pretty strong person and can take a lot before I totally lose it (unlike my sister...sorry Gina). There has only been a few instances where I felt I had no control over a situation. Here they are, in no particular order:
1. In 2001, I had an ectopic pregnancy. The doctors I saw thought it was a miscarriage and they treated it as such (i.e. letting nature take its course). However, it turned out to be something much worse. It was 2 days before the New Year. I was trying to take down the Christmas decorations in our apartment. I was in so much pain that I had to stop every 5 minutes and lie down. When Desi finally came home from drinking at a bar all day with his friend Will (yes, you read me right) I told him I had to go to the emergency room. As I walked to the car, I almost passed out.
In the emergency room, Dr. Cantu (the most amazing Dr. in the whole world...I love her!) figured out it was an ectopic pregnancy. Before they took me into the operating room, I had a tearful conversation with her, asking her to do her best to save my babymaking equipment. She told me that should would remove only that which was necessary. She, of course being a doctor, had to explain that I might not be able to have kids if there was a lot of damage, but she said she would do her best.
Falling asleep before surgery was one of the most frightening moments of my life, not knowing whether Desi and I would have a family or not.
2. My mom going through numerous tests for breast cancer.
3. My dad telling me that he went through numerous tests for cancer.
4. Thinking I was going to lose Logan when I was pregnant with him. I was in the hospital getting an IV because I was so sick and I started to bleed profusely. My little boy hung in there (literally) because he knew I needed him.
